There's nothing like it. You feel alive. You smile at the drop of the hat. You smile even when you are cut off in traffic. Being in love might be the best feeling in the world and I'll admit I've fallen a few times. However, there is nothing like the opposite of that and the feeling that love has been lost and I admit that I have had my heart broken a few times. Twice this year, in fact. But today, I was renewed and reminded, once again, that love, my truest, deepest love is always here for me, like an old friend, like a new dress, like a great memory, like a smile, like...well, love.
Today, a gloomy day in Los Angeles, rare, but sacred, to me, I found myself feeling lethargic.
Like down-ish. My body was aching and sore. Too much working out, perhaps. Not enough sleep, I'm sure of it.
It's hard to get motivated when you feel sluggish. It took me some time to get my energy up and once I did, there it was, love, in all its glory, standing before me with no judgement of how I looked or what I had eaten that day. It said nothing to me but motioned for me to come to it. So I did.
With a light drizzle, I did it. I put on my running shoes, ear buds and ipod mini and hit the streets. My aching body took a moment but in another moment, it all clicked in.
LOVE.
YOGA.
I saw the ocean before me and the gloomy clouds with patches of sun and smog and rain and darkness and light.
I saw a clear, weekendless kind of clear path on a Saturday in Santa Monica,
Parisian dance club music pounding in my ear and my legs, strong and mighty, passing man after woman after bike after blader, after volleyball player after homeless person. It was me, the ocean, the music and I was alone, in love, in union.
We were making love right there. Passionate, sweet, yummy love.
There is nothing like the rediscovery of love that you have for yourself and the things that you enjoy. Being in love with someONE else is wonderful. Being in love with life and your surroundings is surreal. I am so grateful of the life I have made for myself. The ability to run. The nearness of the ocean and the air that comes off of it. The students that I teach. The people that I meet or the friends that I meet up with. My job. My apartment. My friends. My family. My freekin' blog. The potential. The future. The past. The present.
I'm not being precious, just real and in total and utter love.
When you are able to feel that connection with whatever it is that brings you joy, that is love, the deepest, truest, non-judgemental, indescribable, blog worthy love and I am grateful to be back in it if just for now...